In this episode...
I'm joined by Kate Foley - my accountability partner and founder of The Shop Files to share what makes for successful partnerships vs. well-intentioned ones that fizzle out. If you’re wondering what the heck an accountability partnership is: it’s a relationship with another person where you motivate one another, hold each other accountable, and support one another to reach your respective goals.
Kate and I are having this conversation because this concept can be so valuable and beneficial to helping you achieve what you want, whether it’s in your business, with your health, or just in your life. If you’re interested in bringing this concept into your life successfully, we want to help!
We talk about some of the common pitfalls that can happen in these types of relationships and discuss the inner workings of our accountability partnership and how it has come to work and help us each thrive in ways we struggled to do all on our own. If it is done right, an accountability partnership can add immense value to your life. Leaning on your accountability partner (or A.P. for short!) helps motivate you to act with intention and provides priceless support as you work towards your goals.
- When looking for an accountability partner, you don't need to seek out someone EXACTLY the same as yourself with the exact same goals. You do need to make sure that you have similar values and compatible personalities, and equal energetic investment. In other words, you are both willing to put in the same amount of time + commitment.
- We highly recommend that you don’t make your accountability partner someone you are already friends, family, or romantically attached to. We aren't saying it can't work. We are saying it is challenging to ask those personal relationships to shift into this structured, sometimes serious dynamic. If possible, protect your personal relationships and trust that your partnership may blossom into a friendship along the way.
- Ask each other to get to the “why,” and really understand the deeper reason behind each person's dreams. What’s ultimately the reason behind them wanting achieving their goals? As the reasons come out, continue to ask the "why" behind each "why" until you've fully uncovered your true motivations. Latching onto this will help them be more invested in their goal, help you be more invested in helping them reach it, and vice versa.
- Know your personality. Share what works for you with your accountability partner and communicate what you need from them. And of course, be open to giving them what they say they need. Set up the structure and expectations for communication style that works based around each other’s needs
- Always end your interactions in a way that carries the momentum forward. Give them space to express frustrations or be honest about setbacks. Honor their feelings and then ask empowering questions that get them thinking about their next best step. For example... "what's one thing you could do this week to get one step closer to your goal?". This helps guard against every check-in from become just a venting session or ending on a defeated note. And instead puts you in a position to focus on what you can do to move forward.
Put inspiration into action...
- If you decide that you want an accountability partner - write down 2-3 things that you think an accountability partner can bring into your life or help you with. Get clear on what big goal or dream you have been holding back on pursuing, and think about who you could connect with to get you further.
- If you already have an accountability partner and want to strengthen it even further - write down a few ways you can make it more fulfilling and effective. Use the above takeaways or anything else that stood out to you from the episode. Share your thoughts or the full episode with them so you're both on the same page. Compare notes on what did and did not resonate with you from the show.
- Get curious about your personality type. Explore resources that help you get to know yourself better (like Gretchen Rubin's "The Four Tendencies", the Enneagram, etc). Consider how you respond to inner expectations vs. outer expectations. What do you need to succeed?
Links and Resources...
Connect with Kate on Instagram: @theshopfiles
Visit her website: http://www.theshopfiles.com
Check out the book we were talking about in this episode: The Four Tendencies by Gretchen Rubin